Answer key: You don’t know tech

Now that you know how you scored, you probably want to know why. Check out the answers below for the gory details. And be sure to return next week for another news quiz, ripped straight from the tech headlines.

Question 1: Who’s playing that annoying little ditty on the new iTunes ads?

10 points

a.The Ting Tings

The Ting Tings’ “Shut Up and Let Me Go” provides the catchy-yet-irritating soundtrack for Apple’s latest dancing silhouette ad. (The band’s “Great DJ” is also iTune’s Single of the Week — can you say “cross-marketing deal”?) You may now forget you ever heard of them.

Question 2: What project were Stanford and Beijing students collaborating on?

10 points

d.A music performance

Stanford’s Laptop Orchestra performed in front of a live audience with musicians in China using an ultrafast Internet2 connection to stream audio and video between the two locations, so players in one location could watch their counterparts 6,000 miles away. And, presumably, see members of the audience holding lighters and calling out for “Freebird.”

Question 3: What character is at the center of the mayhem in Grand Theft Auto IV?

10 points

b. Niko Bellic

GTA IV is expected to sell 9 million copies and possibly screw up the opening weekend of the movie Iron Man, given the overlap in their respective audiences. But at least it’s keeping the kids off the streets where they might do actual damage, right?

Question 4: What problem are GTA IV fans not having?

10 points

d. Gameplay not violent or crass enough

There have been multiple reports of GTA IV freezing up after the opening cut sequence, a problem affecting users on both Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 platforms. PS3 users also reported screen resolutions of only 640p, not 720p, and an inability to access the online multiplayer version. Other than that, GTA IV has gotten rave reviews, unless you’re a member of Mothers Against Drunk Driving, which has called for upping the game’s Mature rating.

Question 5: Who says the music industry is finally understanding the downside of Digital Rights Management?

10 points

a. MSN Music executive Rob Bennett

Bennett was defending Microsoft’s decision to pull the plug on MSN Music’s DRM servers, which means anyone who downloaded tracks from the now-defunct site will not be able to play them on new devices. Bennett urges consumers to use the Zune Marketplace, which, yes, still sells mostly DRM tracks. We recommend they start with The Who’s “Won’t Get Fooled Again.”

Question 6: What’s the price tag of the as-yet-imaginary iPhone 2.0?

10 points

c. $199

According to a report in Fortune, the next-gen iPhone will appear by midsummer and cost two Ben Franklins (with a two-year AT&T commitment, of course). And if you’re really really good, they’ll give you a pony for your next birthday.

Question 7: What obscure Microsoft program scotched the release of XP Service Pack 3?

10 points

c. Microsoft Dynamics RMS

XP fans will have to wait a little longer for SP3 due to incompatibilities with Dynamics RMS, a retail management system used by small businesses. The service pack, originally due to ship in 2006, may yet appear before Microsoft officially pulls the plug on XP in June. But don’t bank on it.

Question 8: What is HP Labs calling the fourth horseman of the computing apocalypse?

10 points

c.The memristor

Theorized more than 35 years ago, the memristor retains data after the power is shut off — which means it could ultimately replace RAM, allowing for faster and more sophisticated computers that mimic the human brain. But hopefully not just anyone’s brain.

Question 9: What’s Microsoft’s calling its new cop-friendly tool (in five letters or less)?

10 points

a. Computer Online Forensic Evidence Extractor (COFEE)

Microsoft is serving up free COFEE, a USB flash drive containing more than 150 scripts for capturing evidence, to more than 2,000 law enforcement officials worldwide. No word on whether Microsoft plans to release a complementary product, the Distributed Online Network User Terminal (DONUT).

Question 10: What’s Microsoft’s offer times deadline days divided by Yang bucks?

10 points

b. 186

Microsoft offered $31 per share on Feb. 1, and gave Yahoo a deadline of April 26 for entering serious negotiations, or six days ago.  Like Steve Jobs, Jerry Yang takes home a salary of exactly $1 per annum. So (31*6)/1 = 186. A math equation so simple only a Sequoia voting machine could screw it up. Vote early and come back next week for another mind-altering quiz.

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