Dear Bob ... Your advice to several folks who felt wronged by an employer has been "Get over it." Allowing this is good advice, how about some method with that objective? I would love to "Get over" a severe job screwing seven years ago, but still shy away from positions and situations that might mean contact with that organization. Truthfully, and despite the damage it does me, I can't stop hating them. This has Dear Bob …Your advice to several folks who felt wronged by an employer has been “Get over it.” Allowing this is good advice, how about some method with that objective?I would love to “Get over” a severe job screwing seven years ago, but still shy away from positions and situations that might mean contact with that organization. Truthfully, and despite the damage it does me, I can’t stop hating them. This hasn’t stopped me from working, earning a graduate degree, and raising a family, but it sure is a dark cloud I don’t want. Suggestions?– Stormin’ NormanDear Stormin’ … As Huntress once asked in the otherwise dopey show Birds of Prey, “You mean there’s a stage of grief after anger?”Not being a professional psychologist, I don’t have much to offer in the way of counseling. I can certainly share my own perspective on the subject, having been on the wrong end of the occasional political hack-job and backstabbing: Business is just a game. It has no more importance than that. Yes, it was your livelihood, which makes the stakes higher, but it’s still a game. Which means sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, and sometimes you just break even and get to play again.I can tell you with absolute certainty that it’s when I lose this perspective that I stop being effective. What this means is that when you got screwed, you were playing by a different set of rules than the other person. You may like your rules (Marquis of Queensbury) better than the other person’s rules (cage-match wrestling with a script). But that just means you have to be careful to choose a place of employment that enforces your rules in the future. In the end, it’s a game. Some players are Bobby Knight kind of people – winning is the only thing – while others believe it’s how you play the game that matters. If you’re in the second category, good for you. But then, take pride in having worked within that framework and figure that’s your victory, which “getting screwed” can’t take away from you.I don’t know if this will help you or not … the best I can tell you is that it works for me.– Bob ——– Technology Industry