Dear Bob ... I am a senior-level developer who is in the job market because my previous employer has ceased operations. Last week I received an offer from a small company for a position very similar to my last one, and agreed to terms with the company, starting next week. The offer and job are OK, but not ideal; most significantly, it means a noticeable pay cut from what I have been making the past 4-5 yea Dear Bob …I am a senior-level developer who is in the job market because my previous employer has ceased operations. Last week I received an offer from a small company for a position very similar to my last one, and agreed to terms with the company, starting next week. The offer and job are OK, but not ideal; most significantly, it means a noticeable pay cut from what I have been making the past 4-5 years.This week I was called by a company I had previously pursued and, after a successful interview, am being offered a job with them. This second offer is a more attractive one for various reasons (more money, larger company with better benefits and career opportunities, etc.) and I am leaning towards taking it. My questions are:1) Do you think it is possible to graciously bow out of my oral acceptance of the first offer without burning that bridge? I would like to have that company as a future option if at all possible.2) If so, what is the best strategy for informing the first company that I am taking another offer instead? Obviously I don’t expect them to take the news too kindly, but I imagine there are tactics that will be more effective at maintaining a relationship than others. Besides common sense (do it in person, be sincere, etc.) is there anything you would recommend? How much info is prudent to share with them and so forth? – Got a better offerDear Got …You don’t ask this, but it’s embedded: Is it ethical to accept the better offer once you’ve agreed to an earlier one? A decade ago this would have been a greater concern. Now, employees are considered “fungible” by an increasing number of employers who wouldn’t hesitate to lay off a new hire if the situation made that alternative desirable. So ethically, I’d say you have no issue when the situation is reversed.Is it possible to bow out graciously? It’s hard to say – it depends too much on the personalities involved. I’d say yes if you chose as your judge some impartial third-party arbitor of graciousness. Since I don’t hear Miss Manners volunteering for the assignment, I’d say the more important issue is whether you can bow out in a way that leaves you in possession of your self-respect and sense of personal integrity. I don’t see why not.It’s a matter of how you go about it, which is your final question. A telephone conversation is fine for this, I’d think, and in fact in many respects a face-to-face discussion could prove more awkward on both sides, in particular with respect to how you go about ending it. Use your judgment, though, based on what you know of the hiring manager’s personality. I’d recommend calling and being completely candid: “I find myself in an awkward situation – after I accepted the position with your company, another firm I’d been talking to contacted me with an offer that’s quite a bit more lucrative. It’s embarrassing to have to withdraw my acceptance, but we’re talking about enough more money that I really have to.”One of three things will happen: The hiring manager will either be gracious about it and tell you she understands completely, she’ll hit the ceiling and tell you what an ungrateful cur you are, or there will be an uncomfortable silence. For the first, express appreciation; for the second say, “I’m sorry you feel that way,” and hang up, happy you aren’t working for someone who reacts that way; and for dead silence say, “Did we lose the connection? I’m calling from my cell phone.”– Bob ——– Technology Industry