Dear Bob ... Great columns, I have learned a lot. Question: an underling of mine is talented and produces good work, which is basically all I care about. I will call her Mariah. She serves myself and another program lead. My boss is ex-union, and her father was union. I will call her Bertha. She is very concerned about things like signing in, signing out. And apparently she makes Mariah feel feel like she is che Dear Bob … Great columns, I have learned a lot. Question: an underling of mine is talented and produces good work, which is basically all I care about. I will call her Mariah. She serves myself and another program lead. My boss is ex-union, and her father was union. I will call her Bertha. She is very concerned about things like signing in, signing out. And apparently she makes Mariah feel feel like she is checking up on her, making sure she is working, etc. So Mariah doesn’t like to work at my location, she prefers to work at our other location with the other program lead. Again, I don’t care as long as she produces good work, on time, etc. Bertha has no idea whether Mariah produces good work, and has never asked me about her. But with some program changes this summer, Mariah will be forced to work at my location. She is already having trouble sleeping (she is a bit anxious anyway) and the thought of working with Bertha nearby is enough to make her consider leaving the organization. I discussed it with Mariah and the other project lead, who nominated me to talk to Bertha about it (because they feel Bertha is a bit afraid of me.) So I told Bertha that her checking in on Mariah is making her consider leaving. Bertha said Mariah had done some things wrong (like signing out incorrectly) and she can’t worry about how Mariah feels. I told her that was fine, but if Mariah leaves that will be a significant loss to the organization, and both my and the other program lead’s clients. Bertha’s boss is largely ineffectual, but he might be able to mediate somehow. He is probably incapable of laying down the law. Did I handle it correctly? What do I do now?– In the middle Dear Middling …I don’t know that you handled it wrong, but you could have handled it better.First: Lose the term “underling.” You have plenty of alternatives. Personally, I like “gunsel.” Others like “grunt,” “great unwashed,” and “untouchable.” Okay, so I’m sarcastic. How much are you paying for this advice, anyway? Kidding aside, “underling” is demeaning, and if you use it with me you probably use it in conversation. “Reports to me,” “one of my staff,” or something like that sounds a whole lot better.On to substance.It sounds to me as if your empathy for Mariah’s situation and limited respect for Bertha turned into your being open about it to Mariah. Part of your job is to keep any lack of respect for management to yourself. Passing it on is demoralizing to your underlings. Sorry – how could I resist?When you spoke with Bertha, knowing her attitude about such matters, you chose to hit the brick wall with your fist. Your goal in persuasion should always be to drive around the wall instead. In this case, Bertha doesn’t care about employee morale or feelings, but almost certainly would understand your point if you objected to her bypassing the chain of command. She has no business supervising your staff, and if she has a problem with how Mariah signs out (now there’s an offense worth prosecuting!), she should let you know so you can handle the situation.As I say, it isn’t irretrievable. Don’t say anything to Mariah. Do point out the above to Bertha, letting her know that every time she intervenes directly with people who report to you, she reduces your ability to manage effectively. The downside to all this is that you’re going to be serving as insulation between Bertha and your staff. There’s a reason that fecal matter flows downhill. Be aware of the danger so that you don’t become part of the problem later on.– Bob Technology Industry