What's going on at the Stanford Linear Accelerator Center? Cringely has the inside scoop. Officials at the Stanford Linear Accelerator Center are in a tussle with Uncle Sam over, of all things, the lab’s name. At SLAC, researchers send atoms zipping down a 2-mile-long straightaway at breakneck speeds, smash them into little bits, and track where the pieces go, hoping to find particles they haven’t seen before. The feds want to trademark the center’s name to protect itself from lawsuits. (Which raises the question: who exactly is going to sue over SLAC? Relatives of the damaged atoms?) When SLAC said no, you can’t trademark “Stanford,” thank you very much, the Department of Energy said fine, come up with a new name. So they did. Per Silicon Valley.com: One wag suggests “Fundamental-Understanding-of-Nature Discovery MachinE” – or FUNDMe. Another proposed “IAMSOMAD” (Institute of American Master’s Students Operations in Maniacal Accelerations Development).A former SLAC director calls the argument “an example of DOE idiocy.” Looks like they’ll be able to add a new subatomic particle to the list of muons, gluons, and photons: morons. Got new quirks or quarks you’d like to report? Post them below or email me direct: cringe (at) infoworld (dot) com. Top tipsters qualify for quantum swag. Think you’ve got the right stuff to pass our tech quizzes? They’re not as easy as they look: • The InfoWorld News Quiz • Test Your Geek IQ • Test Your Network Security IQ Software DevelopmentSmall and Medium Business