Answer key: You don’t know tech

Now that you know how you scored, you probably want to know why. Check out the answers below for the gory details. And be sure to return next year for another news quiz, ripped straight from the tech headlines.

Question 1: Why is Microsoft’s bid to buy Yahoo on the decline?

10 points

c. Microsoft shares dropped 10 percent since the bid was announced

Since the deal is half cash, half stock, every downward tick of Microsoft stock brings the offer down or requires MSFT to pony up more green, according to Henry (I never met a worthless Web startup I didn’t tout) Blodgett, stock analyst for Silicon Alley Insider. So the deal that Yahoo execs already thought sucked now sucks harder.

Question 2: How much does the RIAA want to pay artists for streaming music?

10 points

c. .58 percent

Under the RIAA’s scheme, the songwriter and artist would split roughly half a penny for every dollar spent on streaming music and 5 cents for digital downloads. The National Music Publishers Association is proposing 12.5 percent for streaming music and 15 cents per track. The RIAA says that in these troubled times everyone has to share the pain — with the possible exception of its attorneys.

Question 3: Who was sticking up for artists’ right to be compensated?

10 points

a. Hilary Rosen

5 points

b. Cary Sherman

c. Mitch Bainwol

The former CEO and president of the RIAA was talking about the music industry’s victory over MP3.com back in 2000, but her sentiments have since been echoed numerous times by Sherman (current RIAA president) and Bainwol (CEO), so give yourself partial credit for those answers. Valenti hasn’t said much since he died last April, but we’re sure the former longtime president of the Motion Picture Association of America agrees.

Question 4: What’s smashing Super Smash Brothers Brawl?

10 points

c. Second-hand cigarette smoke

As the first dual-layer Wii disc, the Smash Bros disc is apparently more sensitive to smoke and dust collecting on the Wii’s internal lens. Nintendo has offered to clean the machines of  nicotine-addicted fans for free. The popular game is slated to ship in the U.S. next month — possibly bundled with packages of Nicorette gum. 

Question 5: What Beatles tune is destined to make the Polaris Top 40?

10 points

c. Across the Universe

The event marked the 50thanniversary of NASA, the 45th anniversary of the Deep Space Network, and the 40th anniversary of the song. But the song the cash-strapped agency probably should broadcast is “Money (That’s What I Want).”

Question 6: What biometric data is the FBI hoping to catalog?

10 points

d.All of the above

Fingerprints schmingerprints — the Feds also want your tats, your palms, and your eyeballs. The bureau is planning to award a 10-year $1 billion contract to the company that can deliver a database capable of cataloging same. Though the G-men say the database will be used solely to fight crime and terrorism, CNN notes that 55 percent of FBI background checks today are on people seeking sensitive jobs. Think about that as you’re getting images of Amy Winehouse tattooed on your bum.

Question 7: What may have actually cut the undersea cables to Asia?

10 points

c. Passing boat anchors and/or fishing nets

To the disappointment of conspiracy theorists everywhere, the prevailing theory remains that boats accidentally severed the cables as they passed over them. Cables get cut dozens of times a year, and it’s just coincidence so many cables in the same area were damaged at the same time. Or so they’d like us all to believe …

Question 8: What can eBayers no longer do?

10 points

b. Say nasty things about buyers

Sellers will bebanned from leaving negative feedback about the people who buy their goods. Apparently there are a lot of “I know you are, but what am I?” comments from sellers retaliating for negative ratings. Also banned: chewing gum, spitballs, and running in the halls.

Question 9: How many AOLers are still out there, patiently waiting for this Web page to load?

10 points

b. 9.3 million

At one time AOL claimed 33 million members, though at just under 10 million it still ranks third in the U.S. behind AT&T and Comcast, according to Internet.com. But as dial-up access goes the way of rotary phones, so go AOL’s subscribers.

Question 10: What’s Choicepoint minus SCO divided by the 32GB Touch?

10 points

a. 20,000

Choicepoint is paying $10 million for leaking the details of 160,000 customers (or roughly $6.50 per customer). SCO made exactly $0 profits (losing $2.9 million) last year. The newest iPod Touch retails for $499 (but we’ll round up to $500 for easier math). So (10 million – 0)/500 = 20,000. Thank God for round numbers, and see you next week for another thrilling quiz.

Ready for more? Take another stab at this week’s quiz, or quizzes past: Test your geek IQ Test your network security IQ InfoWorld news quiz: February 8 InfoWorld news quiz: February 1 InfoWorld news quiz: January 25 InfoWorld news quiz: January 18 InfoWorld news quiz: January 11 InfoWorld news quiz: January 4 InfoWorld news quiz: Year in review InfoWorld news quiz: December 14 InfoWorld news quiz: December 7 InfoWorld news quiz: November 30 InfoWorld news quiz: November 23 InfoWorld news quiz: November 16 InfoWorld news quiz: November 9 InfoWorld news quiz: November 2 InfoWorld news quiz: October 26 InfoWorld news quiz: October 19