Google on trial: The media circus has arrived

I didn’t think it was possible, but I’m starting to feel sorry for Google.

Today, of course, former Google CEO and now chairman Eric Schmidt is on the hot seat in front of a Senate subcommittee for a hearing titled “The Power of Google: Serving Consumers or Threatening Competition?”

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Hearings like this are usually an easy way for senators to get their well-coiffed heads on cable TV but end up achieving nothing of practical importance. They do, however, offer a news hook to which Google’s competitors can adhere themselves. Lately, these folks been sticking to Google — and my inbox — like gum to my shoes.

Today, for example, mimes dressed in white tracksuits printed with the motto “Don’t be evil” (the “Google Track Team”) will be following senators and their aides around the Dirksen Building to draw attention to how Google spies on individuals. At the same time, a “Google ice cream truck” will be parked on the DC mall, handing out delicious iced confections and information on Google’s mobile tracking. These two Yippees-style publicity stunts are being orchestrated by a group called Consumer Watchdog, which has been filling my inbox with anti-Google screeds for the last two years.

This is the same group behind those animated ads featuring Schmidt as the neighborhood perv in an ice cream truck, which ran on a Times Square billboard for six weeks last year. The group has just created another one called “Mr. Schmidt Goes to Washington,” depicting the boring-as-dirt executive as an evil genius with goo-goo-googley spyglasses. These kinds of campaigns aren’t cheap to produce, which means somebody who really hates Google is giving Consumer Watchdog a ton of money. Exactly who, though, is a good question.

Group spokesdog John Simon says it does not receive money from any Google competitors, but declined to identify its sources of funding. In the past, Consumer Watchdog has named four mostly left-leaning charitable groups as contributors: the Rose, Streisand, ARCA, and Tides Foundations. (Among other topics, the CW-dogs also lobby against the high cost of car insurance and prescription drugs.)

Consumer Watchdog is hardly the only organization with a hard-on for Google. There’s the Glover Park Group, a powerful DC lobbying firm that has represented Microsoft, the U.S. Telecom Association, and News Corp., among others. Last year, Glover Park created a coalition called FairSearch.org representing Google competitors like Microsoft, Travelocity, and Kayak.com to campaign against Google’s acquisition of travel search company ITA Software. (It didn’t work.)

This week, FairSearch distributed results from a survey that claimed, “Eight in ten (79%) Americans favor the FTC’s investigation of the company for restricting fair competition and misleading consumers.” Which is not the same as saying 80 percent of Americans believe Google restricts competition and misleads consumers, though it’s pretty clear whoever wrote that sentence wants you to think that.

The actual question they asked:

As you may know, the Federal Trade Commission, or the FTC, is investigating Google’s business practices to make sure that the company is not restricting fair competition or misleading consumers. Do you favor or oppose the FTC investigating these issues?

Also: Your next-door neighbor is being investigated for strangling kittens. Do you favor an investigation into those issues? No? What do you have against kittens?

Both Consumer Watchdog and the Glover Park Group have ties to Grassroots Enterprise, a group run by Edelman PR that has been accused of creating astroturf campaigns across the Web. This leads me to conclude this is all a PR game being fought between giants.

I’m no Google fanboy. Eric Schmidt has certainly made some statements that sent a chill up my spine. But if you’re going to criticize Google, do it for good reasons. Don’t pretend you’re interested in “fairness” or consumer rights when you’re really shilling for another faceless corporation.

Got an actual problem with Google? Share your grievances here or email me: cringe@infoworld.com.

This article, “Google on trial: The media circus has arrived,” was originally published at InfoWorld.com. Follow the crazy twists and turns of the tech industry with Robert X. Cringely’s Notes from the Field blog, and subscribe to Cringely’s Notes from the Underground newsletter.