Dumb and dumber: A phone line fail and the bill that wouldn’t go away

It’s sad but true: In business, you can’t trust anybody, especially outside vendors, and it’s imperative to document everything in case the situation goes haywire. Along the same lines, you hope you can trust your own coworkers to keep their own paper trail — but it might save a lot of grief to be wary. Why am I imparting this advice? Because I’m living the nightmare.

I work at the headquarters for a large corporation, and several years ago we negotiated a contract with a major phone vendor whose service we used at the headquarters location. We also had two remote locations several hundred miles apart bundled into the contract for additional discounts, though they were in different states.

[ More in IT careers: Negotiating and patience are keys to landing a landing a fair IT salary. | Get your weekly dose of workplace shenanigans by following Off the Record on Twitter and subscribing to the Off the Record newsletter. ]

Several years passed with only minor problems that generally were remedied in short order. During that time, the phone vendor was bought out by a larger company, but it seemed to have little effect on service.

But as we neared the end of the initial contract, call quality at Location A began deteriorating. Since a permanent fix seemed to elude the vendor, we exercised our option in the service-level agreement to discontinue service at the location. We rolled the numbers to a new vendor. Then the employees at that site pulled the old vendor’s equipment off the wall and returned it in the prepaid, pre-addressed box supplied for the return.

I watched the monthly bill decrease as the final charges for service at Location A were tallied. After two months, we were down to only one remote location on the bill and no more computations.

But a few months later, the same deteriorating call quality hit Location B. Since we are a sales-oriented company, phone connectivity is extremely important. We decided to get a new vendor for this location also.

We contacted a new vendor, and the numbers were ported with no problem. The old vendor again provided a box for the equipment to be sent back. I began watching the old vendor’s bill, relishing the day I would finally be clear of this duty. The next month’s bill had a partial charge for a half-month’s service, and the following month had a negative amount, as the vendor computed it now owed us $5.90. Since we still used the old vendor’s service at HQ, the amount was to be credited to that account.

But the next month’s bill set off alarms: We owed almost $800. I was on the phone immediately. The phone company said it had never received the equipment from Location B.

I contacted the location and discovered that someone had thrown out the prepaid box from the old vendor. I demanded to know why. Because it was empty, I was told.

I recontacted the phone company and had a new box issued. Several days later, I called the remote location and made sure the device was dismounted and packed up. I was told it was, and pickup was scheduled for the next day.

I was starting to feel like a free man. I watched the bill online and a few days later saw it once again go negative as the phone company received the device.

The next month we got a bill for the same $800. It had now been 16 months from the Location A’s disconnect and four months after Location B’s.

Of course, I contacted the vendor again, who claimed it never received the device from Location B. I directed the rep to the bill and stated we had been credited for it. The vendor asked for the tracking number of the package. I called the employees at Location B to find out what had happened. I got two terrible answers: They didn’t think to record the shipping numbers since the box had been provided by the vendor, and it was with a different shipping company than they usually used.

I choked back unsavory words and called the vendor again, explaining what I’d found out and saying I did know the date the box had been picked up by the delivery company. The vendor promised to do the research, which resulted in a return email stating sorry, the box from Location B had been received; it was the first device of 16 months ago from Location A that never arrived. I again referred to the bills from that time period and showed the credit for the month following termination, indicating the device had arrived. The vendor said it would get back to me.

The next email from the phone vendor said it had done further research, and it was indeed the device from Location B, rather than Location A, that was never received. I started figuring out if we could track a package without a tracking number. The delivery company was able to give me the pickup time, weight, delivery date, and delivery signature.

The next day I received a notice from a collection agency — the vendor had turned over our account to the debt police. Needless to say, my temperature was rising. A few hours later, I received another email from the phone vendor, stating that without a doubt the missing equipment was from Location B. I disclosed my “proof” from the delivery company, hoping I’d trumped them.

But the phone company said they were mistaken again, and it is equipment from Location A that was never returned. I escalated the case to an account manager for the phone vendor, who said he deals with these problems all the time — which brings me no relief as I just want it to go away. While I was on the phone with him, he was able to verify the return of the device from Location B, but couldn’t verify the return 16 months ago from Location A.

We were stuck in limbo for weeks with a bill for $800 and a collection agency waiting to pounce. Imagine my relief when the vendor finally emailed with news that it did determine both devices have indeed been returned and our account is to be credited. One hurdle down — now we await the vendor’s accounting department to call off the collection dogs.

Employees at every location have been re-instructed on the importance of logging tracking numbers and other pertinent details for all outgoing material, regardless of vendor or supplier. And I’m reminded to make sure expectations and instructions are communicated as clearly as possible. Because it’s true that the devil is in the details.

This story, “Dumb and dumber: A phone line fail and the bill that wouldn’t go away,” was originally published at InfoWorld.com. Read more crazy-but-true stories in the anonymous Off the Record blog at InfoWorld.com. For the latest business technology news, follow InfoWorld.com on Twitter.